Know Someone Who Feels Stuck? Consider These Four Practices

That “stuck” feeling often shows up when something deep within you is asking for change…

By Lauren Holler, ALC, Holistic Nutrition and Wellness Coach

Lately, I’ve heard this word a lot—in sessions, conversations, even in my own thoughts.

I feel stuck.

Stuck in a relationship that no longer feels right, but too afraid or unsure to leave.
Stuck in the loop of anxiety, unsure how to quiet the noise.
Stuck in burnout, so overwhelmed that even small decisions feel exhausting.

If any of that sounds familiar, let me remind you of something I tell my clients often:

You’re never truly stuck.

You may feel paralyzed or uncertain. You may feel like there’s no clear way out. But stuck is just a moment and a feeling — it’s not your identity, and it’s definitely not forever.

In fact, that “stuck” feeling often shows up when something deep within you is asking for change—but your brain and body aren’t quite sure how to move forward. That’s not a flaw. That’s biology.

Why Stuck Feels So Real (Even When It’s Not Permanent).

Our brains are wired for safety and familiarity. They crave comfort—even if what we have been doing isn’t working anymore, or better yet, it’s actually toxic. Our brain doesn’t care, as long as it’s familiar.

So when you start to consider a shift—leaving, changing, slowing down—your nervous system might panic. Your body may freeze. Suddenly, the idea of progress feels overwhelming or even dangerous.

It’s not that you’re incapable. It’s that your brain and body is trying to protect you. That’s its job, after all!

And learning how to move through that discomfort takes practice and intention. And a whole lot of self-awareness. Self-awareness is the key ingredient and predecessor to change. 

Lately, I’ve been trying to pick up surfing. My husband is an awesome surfer, we live on the beach, I love the water, and I’ve always wanted to get better at it. But let me tell you…  it’s hard. 

Some days, the water is calm and glassy. Those are the days when it clicks, when I find my balance, when I think—“maybe I’m getting the hang of this!”

But other days? The wind picks up, the waves are close together, the current is strong. I fall. I get tossed around. I get frustrated. I feel weak. I feel like I don’t know what I’m doing at all.

Trying something new—whether it’s a skill, a relationship boundary, or a shift in your mindset—is just like my surfing endeavor.

There are smooth days where you feel steady and confident, and then there are messy ones where everything crashes and you’re not sure you’ll ever get it right.

But it’s all part of the process. Falling doesn’t mean you’re failing. It means you’re learning and growing.

So What Can You Do?

When you’re feeling stuck—emotionally, mentally, physically—your first instinct might be to push through, fix it fast, or shame yourself for not having it all figured out. But what you really need is gentleness, curiosity, and small, steady movements. Here’s where to begin:

1. Start small. Smaller than you think.

We often believe we need to make a massive change to feel better—but real change begins with the tiniest shift. Drinking water when you wake up. Getting outside for five minutes. Sending the email. Naming the feeling. These are not insignificant. They are signals to your nervous system that you’re safe to move forward.

2. Calm the body before the mind.

If your nervous system is disregulated (in fight, flight, or freeze) your thinking brain isn’t fully online. Before making any decisions, you have to calm your body. Breathe. Walk. Do some yoga. Listen to a meditation. Ground yourself in the present moment. Action is easier when your nervous system is calm.

3. Ask yourself what you need—not what you “should” do.

The word should often comes from old narratives, pressure, or perfectionism. Let’s ditch that word! Instead, try:
What do I need right now?
What would feel peaceful or supportive in this moment?
That’s where you’ll find your next step.

4. Most Importantly: Invite.

Remember to invite the One who holds all things together. Instead of asking Him, “Why am I stuck in this season/situation/challenge?” ask Him, “God, what do you want me to know about [whatever it is that is keeping you stuck]?” Take time to listen, journal, and share with a trusted friend.

Remember: stuck is not forever.

You won’t always feel this way. Clarity and momentum will return—especially when you allow yourself to slow down, listen to your body, and receive the support and guidance available to you when you need it most.

Lauren is a therapist and holistic nutrition coach offering individual therapy in person in Fairhope, Alabama or virtually to Alabama residents through Live and Love Wellness. www.LandLWellness.com 

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